I should be working on my fic right now

[ratbones]

1. Rattiekins is cold. Needs hugs. Or at least a blanket and some tea. It was 75 degrees here a week ago, and today's high was barely above freezing. I don't hate winter, I just want more autumn first. :(

2. Got a box from Bangkok this week: presents from my aunt! It included a notebook with a kitty on it, two pens with hedgehog-shaped toppers, and a shirt that both fits me and suits my tastes. Everything was wrapped in colorful paper and tied with curly ribbon. Am I too old to get hedgehog pens from my auntie for no reason? I'm glad she doesn't think so. Don't tell the rest of my flock of relatives, but she's my favorite.

3. The anxiety I had when I started posting Zombie WIP was that nobody would like it. The anxiety I have now is that several people like it and I must not disappoint them. I much prefer the second one, but it's still a thing, and now I also have anticipatory anxiety about what to do with myself and my words when I get to the end. These are good anxieties to have, though. These are anxieties about wanting to make sure that I and others continue having a good time. Since when do I get to worry about things like that? It's new.

4. According to my own schedule, I'm meant to post a chapter on Tuesday. That might not happen. I've never promised anyone I'll post a chapter on a certain day, but I've also not fallen behind my own personal deadlines since August, and that was for external reasons. This is just...I procrastinated a lot this past week? I have a little section here, prior to endgame events, where I just have to let the characters figure out how they're going to muddle through, but after the last three chapters, in which every scene had to happen exactly how it happened, I got a bit spoiled and now I don't FEEEEL like muddling. As soon as I have a chunk of time -- tomorrow evening, I hope -- I need to sit down and just bang out a few imperfect scenes and see what's going to work. I do recognize that the procrastination has something to do with the anxieties mentioned in #3.

5. Every item on the list got longer than the previous one, so I've made a short one at the end to prove that I can stop myself if I want to.

Comments

[xparrot]

Those are good anxieties to have... If still pressure! I hope it more encourages than impedes. (I haven't read the fic yet but I'm so looking forward to it when I do!)

[extrapenguin]

Am I too old to get hedgehog pens from my auntie for no reason? I'm glad she doesn't think so.
No-one is too old to get hedgehog pens for no reason! (Be sure to brainwash any junior relatives so they know to send you hedgehog pens in your eventual retirement home.)

I feel you on autumn being too short. Summer lasted forever, so I only really got 2 weeks of wearing my amazing collection of Zhao Yunlan -style jackets before it got cold. (I managed to get another week by layering, but it's been solidly wool coat weather for a month. And there's snow on the ground, now.)

The anxiety I had when I started posting Zombie WIP was that nobody would like it. The anxiety I have now is that several people like it and I must not disappoint them. I much prefer the second one, but it's still a thing, and now I also have anticipatory anxiety about what to do with myself and my words when I get to the end.
Aw, hugs! And a blanket and tea. Perhaps thinking of your track record might work? You already wrote a longfic and didn't disappoint people – of course you can stick the landing on this one as well.

I have a little section here, prior to endgame events, where I just have to let the characters figure out how they're going to muddle through, but after the last three chapters, in which every scene had to happen exactly how it happened, I got a bit spoiled and now I don't FEEEEL like muddling.
I feel you. I am going to now use my nonexistent Dixing powers of clairvoyance/remote hard drive reading to diagnose your fic with ... a tragic lack of geese! Just add a goose for extra conflict. *g*

[frith_in_thorns]

*warming hugs* I tell everyone that I'm a cold-blooded lizard, to match my cold heart. I like things warm. (I do like that we have the winter duvet, ie the PROPER duvet, back on the bed now and I have an electric under-blanket which is AMAZING.)

I know both those anxieties very well and constantly wrestle with them. I can only say that I'm really sure all of us will love whatever you write, because evidence shows that we love your writing!

Also, post-fic drop is real. It took me like three days to write the last scene of Goblin Fruit, which I finished on Friday night, and then I didn't do any writing yesterday except for words which get added during editing. I have plans and everything, it's just hard and always happens. But after a few days you start something else!

[clevermanka]

after the last three chapters, in which every scene had to happen exactly how it happened, I got a bit spoiled and now I don't FEEEEL like muddling
Solidarity fistbump, bb. That's where I was with Ghost Story recently and it suuuuuuucks. Bang out those scenes, bb! You know what they say about going through hell... =D

[forestofglory]

*hugs and tea*

[umadoshi]

*hugs and tea!*

Am I too old to get hedgehog pens from my auntie for no reason?

NEVER.

Anxiety is rough regardless of whether it's rooted in things that are good overall. *sympathies* Good luck with it all! I have faith in you!

[naye]

Please tell me you're warm now as I missed my chance to bring blankets and tea.

And yes, these are good anxieties to have, but the stress is still real!

I can guarantee that whatever you come up with, if it's something you like, I will like it too. Because I love your brain with its plotty ways and delicious slow-burn and ALL the feels, and if you wrap your story up so you're satisfied yourself I know I will have the BEST time reading it. ♥

[unrelaxing]

Anxiety, even if one is better than the other, is still so hard to work through, and I'm glad you have (had?) a plan on how to fix number 3's impact on number 4!