(This has been waiting in my inbox until I had an actual brain cell to respond! Such an interesting topic honestly.)
Like, there's not one true genuine self, IMO, and it's normal to be different in different contexts, and if I'm self-editing to facilitate making real connections with other people, that seems fine. Yes, you said it way better than me! Everyone has different facets, so as long as it's self-editing to have those genuine conversations, it's actually a productive thing to do. And it's perfectly natural.
But some social frameworks incentivize presenting oneself as...kind of a product, in a way that just closes off real conversations I see this as well, the sort of commoditization of the self which ends up becoming more of a character. Which isn't sustainable at all, especially when wanting real connections. (And hey, there's definitely space I think for not wanting that!) But yeah, I've enjoyed the Dreamwidth community and how people share things on here. It does have that oldschool vibe! The web designer in me has a few bones to pick with the format, but the spirit is wonderful and people have been lovely. Admittedly I'm still trying to unlock how to really get to know people on here, because I'm used to rapidfire chat formats like Discord, but overall the sense of community is really nice here. I'm really glad your moving to Dreamwidth has let you find and friend people more easily!
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Date: 2020-03-25 08:41 pm (UTC)Like, there's not one true genuine self, IMO, and it's normal to be different in different contexts, and if I'm self-editing to facilitate making real connections with other people, that seems fine.
Yes, you said it way better than me! Everyone has different facets, so as long as it's self-editing to have those genuine conversations, it's actually a productive thing to do. And it's perfectly natural.
But some social frameworks incentivize presenting oneself as...kind of a product, in a way that just closes off real conversations
I see this as well, the sort of commoditization of the self which ends up becoming more of a character. Which isn't sustainable at all, especially when wanting real connections. (And hey, there's definitely space I think for not wanting that!) But yeah, I've enjoyed the Dreamwidth community and how people share things on here. It does have that oldschool vibe! The web designer in me has a few bones to pick with the format, but the spirit is wonderful and people have been lovely. Admittedly I'm still trying to unlock how to really get to know people on here, because I'm used to rapidfire chat formats like Discord, but overall the sense of community is really nice here. I'm really glad your moving to Dreamwidth has let you find and friend people more easily!