ratbones | Still pro-vax but I admit I wavered there for a minute (and other news)

I had my second dose of vaccine weeks ago but didn't get around to telling the story.

My first shot was no big deal. My arm hurt and I was a bit groggy, maybe had a minor headache. I get a sore arm from every shot every time, including my yearly flu shot, and being groggy and headachey is frequently a symptom of being an adult with responsibilities, so I wasn't fazed.

The afternoon and evening of the second shot seemed to be shaping up the same way: arm pain, mild fatigue. I went to bed early.

Exactly 12 hours after the second shot, which was 3 AM, I woke up hot and sweaty and uncomfortable. I got up to pee, got back in bed, and the violent shivering began. I get skin sensitivity with fevers, so shivering equated to constant low-level all-over pain as my flesh vibrated against my bedclothes. I took ibuprofen after about fifteen minutes of not being able to quit shivering but it didn't quit for nearly an hour, and even when it died down I felt horrible and couldn't fall asleep for a further few hours.

For a while I texted cyberbrain, who listened to my whining with extreme gentleness and sympathy, but then I ran out of steam for that. So what I did was I listened to the entirety of Richard Cheese's new album. Did you know Richard Cheese was still doing covers? Do you know how surreal it is to be curled up in the dark, steamrolled by a brutal fever and muscle aches, unmoving for hours but awake in the light of your phone screen, utterly alone in the way only pain can leave a person utterly alone, watching a lounge singer croon Megan Thee Stallion in the style of Sinatra? YUH. I'm not gonna say I recommend the experience, but it certainly induces an altered mind state, if you're into that sort of thing.

Anyway, eventually I fell asleep, and the next day I spent either asleep or lying under my duvet wishing I could sleep because everything hurt and consciousness was terrible. I had every single side effect listed by the CDC all dialed up to 11. The effort of eating four crackers to avoid taking pills on an empty stomach exhausted me for hours afterwards. I made the mistake of letting my mom bring me a smoothie with ice when she asked if she could drop off anything, and it tasted great but left me in that awful shivering state for another hour or so. I realized, after that night's twelve-hour coma, that I'd worn the same pajamas for over 36 straight hours, while fever-sweating. Bleagh. I was more functional the next day, but then slept for twelve hours that night as well.

My friends of a similar age and fitness level do not seem to be getting whammied like I did, and I'm glad for that, but holy shit. I don't know if having had covid (probable, not confirmed) might be why I got sicker or if I was just unlucky or what, but. Just. Holy shit. I haven't been sick once since having probably-covid (masks work!) which I think made me even more pathetic about it.

Vaccines are not only good but absolutely necessary for the fate of the species during a pandemic, even if the process of getting to immunization kind of sucks. (Didn't I write something else about that? Hm...nah, can't recall.) Anyway, still glad I got the vaccine, appreciative of the privilege I had in getting mine so early, and hoping everyone here will get theirs soon, if they haven't yet.

Odds & ends section:
1. My second ao3versary was about two weeks ago now. I posted roughly 140k words in my second year, which is down from just over 200k in my first year but really nothing to sneeze at during a pandemic! (Aheh heh heh.) Also somehow I've gotten to the point where even new acquaintances seem to imagine me as a literal rat, which is an interesting development because it's not how I initially intended or expected my screenname to be interpreted, but I've certainly encouraged it. (It's cute.) I hope this doesn't count as building a personal brand.

2. I finished Word of Honor a while ago! I really enjoyed it overall and love all of the major characters, especially Wen Kexing and Gu Xiang. I'm also really delighted by what they were able to do with the central romance; there's so much TOUCHING, and the leads have real chemistry. There were a couple stretches of episodes that felt a bit like being in a waiting room -- lots of conversations and scheming, everyone anticipating a big fight, but very little actually happening in the lead-up -- but I think that might just be me. I'm also not really looking for fic or doing anything with the fandom, but at this point I'm sure that's not the show's fault. I'm just Guardian-brained. Cannot remember the before-times.

3. You might remember I got a new laptop in December. Since then, my old laptop had just been gathering dust, until one day, it occurred to me that I have two laptops now. I reinstalled Windows on the old laptop, which got it running a little bit faster, and then, and here is the key thing, I only installed the programs I need for writing. Having a distraction-free writing-only station turns out to be highly effective for me! Part of it is just a mind game I'm playing on myself; if I open that laptop, I'm setting the intention to focus only on writing, and as long as I stick to that every time, it makes it so much easier to stay on-task. If I want to not be writing, I can go do that -- somewhere else. Anyway, we'll see how long that lasts, I guess, but I'm really enjoying it now.

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clevermanka

Do you know how surreal it is to be curled up in the dark, steamrolled by a brutal fever and muscle aches, unmoving for hours but awake in the light of your phone screen, utterly alone in the way only pain can leave a person utterly alone, watching a lounge singer croon Megan Thee Stallion in the style of Sinatra?
That sounds like something, for sure. Sucks that you got hit so hard, bb. Ooof.

Fantastic that the writing-only laptop is working for you! For now, anyway!

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Still pro-vax but I admit I wavered there for a minute (and other news)

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